Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
When are your genitals available?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
