Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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