so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Please, let me fuck your mom
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
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