i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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