I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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