found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Damn victory sex feels great
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize