For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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