Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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