Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
