he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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