That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
