wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
