You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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