Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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