i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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