If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
