Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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