so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
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