I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
