Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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