watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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