i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
