Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Randomize
