So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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