this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
