real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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