No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
