He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
