p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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