If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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