I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
