Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
