More tranny stories later!
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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