We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
We were destined to go to rehab together
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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