No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
