there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
The best revenge is premature balding
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I could fuck to npr.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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