Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Randomize