my mouth tastes like poor choices
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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