Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Do vagina's smell?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Are we still banned from the library?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
