I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
