It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
