And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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