It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
