I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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