i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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