Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
