Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
