Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
