i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
We named our party play list daddy issues
someone owes me an orgasm
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
