Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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